Mother of the Bride Duties: A Guide | Pearl by David's Blog (2024)

Posted at 17:11hin Wedding Etiquette, Wedding Inspiration, Wedding Planningbydavidsbridal

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12 important duties the Mother of the bride can play at the wedding!

Mother, grandmother, sister, aunt, friend…the bride isn’t the only woman who plays an important role in the wedding. Mother and all of those important mother figurers provide us a shoulder to lean on especially in the wedding planning process. As a bride, the mother or mother figure can be such an integral part in the planning and celebrating of her special day. Mother of the bride duties can vary but we’ve rounded up 12 special ways a mom can play an important role in the wedding planning process and the big day.

  1. Participate In Dress Shopping – Dress shopping is a big moment in the wedding planning process so asking your mom or mother figure to come along is very special. Having a close circle of people with you as you dress shop can help you decide on which dress to say yes to.

2. Walk You Down The Aisle – While the tradition may be for the bride’s father to walk her down the aisle, it has become extremely popular for a bride to have both her mother and father walk her down or just the mother.

3. Give a speech at the reception – The conventional thinking was that the mother and father of the bride were the “host” of the wedding reception because tradition was they would pay for the event. In today’s world we know many weddings don’t rely solely on the parents of the bride paying for the wedding but it is still a honor to ask the mother along with the father to welcome the guests with a toast.

4. Host and/or attend the bridal shower – While the bridal party is responsible for hosting the bridal shower it seems more MOB’s are being an active member in the planning process and in some cases are even hosting the event.

5. Help craft the guest list – One the first major tasks a couple needs to take on is creating the guest list. Asking the MOB for help with outlining who should be invited and assigning her the task of collecting all of the contact information for the guests is a fantastic way to get the MOB in the planning process and take some stress off the bride.

6. Participate in venue search – Of course the couple will want to see all the venues they are considering but before a visit to the venue can happen many times the bride will need help researching venues, enquiring if they are available and coordinating a venue tour. This is a perfect job of the MOB who might not be as busy as the bride-to-be.

7. Coordinate the MOB and MOG wedding day attire – Once the bride has selected her wedding dress and the bridal party has a clear idea on what attire they will be wearing it is time for the MOB and MOG to select their outfits. Many times the MOB and MOG will work together and share ideas around outfits so that they don’t dress in something too similar.

8. Advise on the seating chart – Seating charts can be tricky and figuring out how to blend together two families and countless friends and relatives can be a lot. Asking for assistance and tackling the seating chart is a great way to get the MOB involved.

9. Stand in the post ceremony receiving line – There is a growing trend to bring back the receiving line at weddings. The receiving line is where the couple and bridal party greet the guests post ceremony. Asking the MOB to be a central part of that line is a lovely way to honor her important role in the day.

10. Borrow her jewelry, veil or something else special as your “something borrowed” – Many times the bride will look for a meaningful way to incorporate something “borrowed” from the MOB or another mother figure. Think about asking to borrow jewelry, her veil or something else you can have with you as you walk down the aisle.

11. Host the farewell brunch the day after the wedding – Many couples will host a farewell brunch the day after the wedding as a way to say goodbye to their guests who traveled for the wedding. Most of the time this event will take place at the hotel where the majority of the guests are staying. There is no set rule who should host this wedding event but it is a nice event for the MOB to take on and coordinate.

12. Be the vendor contact on wedding day – The bride should only be focused on enjoying her wedding day but it is encouraged to give all the wedding vendors a point of contact on the big day if they have questions. Assign the MOB this role can help take pressure off the bride!

Let’s Hear From Real Brides!

To help brides and the special women in their lives understand a mom’s role in a wedding, we asked some David’s Bridal brides to tell us more about their leading ladies and how they’ve contributed to their weddings. Scroll down to be inspired by these amazing women and their contributions to these weddings.

Mother of the Bride Duties: A Guide | Pearl by David's Blog (1)

Tell us about the beautiful woman you’re pictured with.

Photographed is my Great-Aunt Paulette. I come from a big family, with a hosts of amazing aunts – Paulette is by far my favorite! When I lost my Mom my senior year of high school, Paulette welcomed me with opened and loving arms to live with her for as long as I needed. To know her is to love her- She truly is the rock of our family.

Do you have a favorite memory with her from wedding planning and/or your wedding day?

I have so many great memories from our wedding day! My Aunt Paulette has a fear a flying. In fact, she has never been on a air plane before, until the week of our wedding! She put her fear aside to attend our most special day! Because my Aunt Paulette means so much to me, I asked her to walk me down the aisle. It’s a memory I will cherish forever!

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve received from her?

When life doesn’t go as planned, keep trying. What’s meant to be will happen, on Gods timing.

Mother of the Bride Duties: A Guide | Pearl by David's Blog (2)

Tell us about the beautiful woman you’re pictured with.

This is mom, my rock and my best friend!

How does she inspire you?

My mom inspires me to live authentically. Her favorite parenting line is “actions speak louder than words” and for me that always meant to show up and be present. My words mean nothing if my actions don’t match.

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve received from her?

The best advice my mom has ever given me is to remain true to myself.

Mother of the Bride Duties: A Guide | Pearl by David's Blog (3)

Tell us about the beautiful woman you’re pictured with

My mom is one of the most amazing women I know! She’s got a servant’s heart and is always looking for ways to help those around her. Her beautiful smile lights up any room!

Do you have a favorite memory with her from wedding planning and/or your wedding day?

Going into anything when wedding planning, my mom always asked me first, “what do you want? I will fight for it.” My mom was determined that no one would push me into making a decision about the wedding just to please them.

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve received from her?
The best piece of advice I’ve ever received from my mom is honestly to just try my best and then let it go! From college to my first job to becoming a wife, my mom always encouraged me to appreciate the little victories and let my worries go with the knowledge that I am giving my all.

Mother of the Bride Duties: A Guide | Pearl by David's Blog (4)

Tell us about the beautiful woman you’re pictured with

My mother is my best friend and always my shoulder to lean on. She has a beautiful soul and I admire her so much.

How does she inspire you?

My mom inspires me to be patient and graceful. She continuously shows others peace and love throughout her day.

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve received from her?
The best advice my mother has given me is to be true to yourself and to take the path in life that will make you truly happy.

Mother of the Bride Duties: A Guide | Pearl by David's Blog (5)

Tell us about the beautiful woman you’re pictured with

My beautiful mom is a firecracker who loves with her whole being, serves without hesitation, brightens any room she walks in, and will make every person she talks to feel loved, seen, and known.

Do you have a favorite memory with her from wedding planning and/or your wedding day?

On the morning of my wedding I woke up in my childhood bedroom. My mom came into my room with the most intentional and sweet gifts in her hands. As I opened the gifts and read her sweet card we cried and prayed together. This moment was so intimate and magnified the bond we have as mother and daughter. I would not be who I am, or the wife I am today without her wisdom, love, care, and guidance.

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve received from her?

She has modeled so well how to be vulnerable and how to communicate feelings. In our family we share the depths of our hearts which has made us all very close. The way she lived her life and modeled this to us was the best life advice given. To put the advice into words I learned to bring our darkness to light, because once the light exposes darkness we can then begin the beautiful process of healing.

If we’ve learned anything from these brides, it’s that mother of the bride duties can vary in the physical ways she contributes to the day, but there’s no doubt that her most important job is to be a guiding light showing her support and love for the bride.

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Mother of the Bride Duties: A Guide | Pearl by David's Blog (2024)

FAQs

What is the duty of the mother of the bride? ›

The mother of the bride plays the role of hostess, meaning you should spend some time greeting guests during the reception. Although there are exceptions, other wedding-day duties may include sitting at the parents' table and dancing with the father of the bride to help warm up the dance floor.

What should the mother of the bride not do? ›

So, a basic rule of wedding etiquette is that the mother of the bride should not outshine her daughter. So, don't choose gowns or dresses that would overpower the bridal gown. Also, try to avoid loud patterns that will overwhelm in photos and make you stand out from the rest of the wedding party.

Does the mother of the bride give a gift to her daughter? ›

While it is traditional (although not obligatory) for the mother and father of the bride to receive a thank you gift from the newlyweds on the big day, a little memento from the bride's parents to their daughter is also becoming more popular.

Does the mother of the bride pay for the bridal shower? ›

Although once upon a time it was expected that the bride's family would foot the bridal shower bill, modern society has changed the rules. Nowadays, the person (or people) hosting the bridal shower are responsible for covering the costs associated with the shower.

What color should the mother of the bride wear? ›

Try blues, greens, purples, and neutrals such as navy, emerald, plum, or silver. These versatile – and universally flattering – palettes make it easy for mothers of the bride and groom to harmonize. With pale green and blue tints, we love silvery shades for Mum, while jewel tones pair well with other rich colours.

What are the roles and responsibilities of a mother? ›

Scholars define mothering many ways, but most include the idea that nurturing children is the central task. Nurturing includes meeting children's physical demands, such as food, clothing, and protection. And it includes loving, cherishing, educating, and training them.

Who walks the bride's mother down? ›

The mother of the bride is traditionally escorted by her son if she has one. Otherwise, any close male relative, the best man, or a groomsman walks with the mother of the bride during the procession.

What makes a dress a mother of the bride dress? ›

A: The Mother of the Bride is special. She needs to stand out a bit from the bridesmaids, so her dress should complement rather than match the bridesmaid's dresses. For example, the MOB could wear a dress in a similar color to the bridesmaids but in a deeper shade.

Does the mother of the bride say anything at the wedding? ›

Yes, the mother of the bride can give a speech at a wedding. Traditionally, men gave speeches, but times have changed. The decision is based on the bride and her mother's choice, often reflecting their bond. The speech should ideally last around five minutes, and toasting is expected.

What do I say to my daughter on her wedding day? ›

Congratulations, [I/we] love you. [Daughter's name] and [spouse's name], you've overcome so many challenges to get to this day. No matter what the future holds, your love for each other will always see you through. Congratulations on your wedding day!

What gift does a mom give her daughter on her wedding day? ›

Jewellery has always been a timeless and cherished gift for weddings. Consider gifting your daughter a piece of personalised jewellery, such as a necklace, bracelet, or ring, with her name, initials, or wedding date engraved on it.

Who buys the mother of the bride outfit? ›

Traditionally, the mother of the bride selects her dress first, then communicates the details to the groom's mom.

Who should not host a bridal shower? ›

Traditional etiquette dictates that the maid of honor—not the mother of the bride—should host the shower. Nancy is a freelance writer for MarthaStewart.com. Some etiquette rules were meant to fade away into oblivion, like the one about family members of the bride not hosting her bridal shower.

Who pays for Jack and Jill's party? ›

Historically, a Jack and Jill was a celebration before the wedding in order to raise money for the couple. An example of this would be holding a party and charging invited guests an admissions fee of ~$5, which would go toward the engaged couple.

What is the mother of the bride responsible for? ›

A key mother of the bride task on the day of the wedding is to host the reception with the other parents. Take the time to chat to guests, thank them for coming, ensure everything is happening as it should be and just generally make sure the day is running smoothly.

Who walks out the mother of the bride? ›

The mother of the bride is traditionally escorted by her son if she has one. Otherwise, any close male relative, the best man, or a groomsman walks with the mother of the bride during the procession.

Does Mother of the Bride give a speech? ›

Yes, the mother of the bride can give a speech at a wedding. Traditionally, men gave speeches, but times have changed. The decision is based on the bride and her mother's choice, often reflecting their bond. The speech should ideally last around five minutes, and toasting is expected.

Does the mother of the bride get ready with you? ›

Get Ready With The Bride

When it comes to duties for the mother of the bride, getting ready with your daughter is by far one of the most special. The time you spend with the bride on the morning of her wedding will be one of your most treasured mother-daughter relationship moments.

What is the responsibility of the bride's parents? ›

Traditionally, the bride's parents pay for the wedding ceremony and reception which is why they take on the role of host/hostess. This responsibility includes determining the final guest count, making guests feel welcomed and seeing that everything goes smoothly. Oversee the closing of the reception.

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