Wedding Etiquette: How to Have Two Maid of Honors (2024)

For some brides, deciding who to choose as your maid of honor can be a tough decision.

Should you choose your sister? Your best friend from college? The friend who just had you as the MOH in her wedding?

Remember, just asking someone to be a bridesmaid is a huge honor. There’s no need to feel guilty for singling out one maid as your numero uno.

But, if making the decision seems like an impossible feat, there is a way around it:

Have two maids of honor instead of one!

Not sure how to make it work?

Here is our wedding etiquette guide for how to have two maids of honor.

Can You Have Two Maids of Honor?

Wedding Etiquette: How to Have Two Maid of Honors (1)Photo: Bella Charleston/Rachel Red

Having two maids of honor is perfectly fine … and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

After all, this is YOUR wedding day. You make the rules and can plan your day however you want.

If you want to have twenty bridesmaids, go for it. If you only want one, that’s fine too!

And if you’re super close with two people and can’t choose between them, then make them both a MOH!

Just let them both know up front that they’ll be sharing the spotlight. Make it clear to them that they are both super important to you and that there was no way to choose one over the other. Chances are, they’ll love the idea.

If you’re having a large bridal party, it can actually be really helpful to have two maids of honor to help out with the wedding planning.


Make One a Matron of Honor

Is one of your MOHs married? You can make a distinction by calling the single one your maid of honor and the married one yourmatron of honor. Brides have been doing this for decades.

If neither are married, then they’ll both share the same “maid of honor” title. And if both happen to be married, then technically you’ll have two matrons of honor. Either way works!

As soon as youask them to be in your wedding party, let them know that they can share all of the MOH responsibilities together. They can even give a maid of honor speech together at your wedding reception (if they feel comfortable doing so).

Get Them Acquainted

Wedding Etiquette: How to Have Two Maid of Honors (2)Photo: Bella Charleston/KMI Photography

Do your two MOHs know each other? If so, great! This is going to be a whole lot easier (and you skip to our next tip).

But what if they aren’t already friends?

If your maids of honor don’t know each other (or know each other well), it’s up to you to get them acquainted months before the big day.

Let’s say one is your sister and the other is your BFF from college. You know them both inside and out, so think about some things they have in common and spend some time helping them bond over shared interests.

Take them out for dinner and drinks. Start conversations about things that you know they both love (besides you!).

Do whatever you have to do to help them get along and learn how to work together. After all, the better they get along, the easier it will be for you.

Related:

Let Them Both Plan Important Pre-Wedding Events

The maid of honor is usually responsible for planning the bachelorette party and the bridal shower. Since you have two, you can let them decide for themselves who will plan what.

It’s best to encourage them to work together and plan your events as a team. But if they’re very different people, it might be best to have each plan a different event.

Is one a mini Martha Stewart with a knack for planning brunches? Let her handle the shower. Is one a tequila-loving party girl? It goes without saying that she should probably plan your bachelorette.

If they’re already friends that can work well together, they’ll probably want to plan your pre-wedding events as a team. If they’re not as close, they may prefer to divvy up certain tasks.

On the day of the wedding, there may be a lot of maid of honor duties. Having two close friends to help you out can keep the wedding running smoothly and onschedule!

Make Them Both Stand Out

Wedding Etiquette: How to Have Two Maid of Honors (3)Photo: Bella Harrisburg/Addie Eshelman

As the bride with two MOHs by her side, it’s your job to make sure that both of them feel special and that both stand out from the rest of the bridal party.

One way to do this is to have them wear different dresses than the other bridesmaids. They can wear the same dresses or each wear a different one.

Personally, we love the idea of having each MOH wear a different dress. That way, even if the rest of your bridesmaids wear the same gown, your bridal party can still have that cool,mixed-and-matchedlook.

Prefer to have everyone in your bridal party wear the same dress?

Help your MOHs stand out by carrying different bouquets or adding a glitzy belt to their dress. Even the littlest details will make it obvious that these are your go-to girls.

If you’re looking for the perfect bridesmaid dresses, head to aBella Bridesmaids locationnear you!

Let Them Walk Down the Aisle Together

The maid of honor is the last person to walk down the aisle before the bride. If you have two, let them walk down together. That way, they’ll know that they are truly equals in your heart.

Only having one best man? No problem! When the bridal party makes their exit after the wedding ceremony, your best man can escort both of your lovely ladies down the aisle at the same time.

But who should stand closest to you while you’re saying your vows?

Here’s where it sometimes gets tricky.

The maid of honor usually stands closest to the bride and holds the bride’s bouquet. If one of your besties is a matron of honor, you can ask her to stand in the second spot. But if they’re both equal MOHs, you’ll just have to decide who stands where.

A great way to make them both feel equal (regardless of where they stand) is to give them different duties during the ceremony.

Have one be responsible for the groom’s wedding ring and the other hold your bouquet. This is a great way to honor both of them without putting too much focus on who stands where!

Don’t forget your littlest ‘maid! Find yourflower girl dresshere!

Conclusion

Deciding who to include in your bridal party is a big decision, but it’s a fun one to make. And if you can’t pick one maid of honor to stand out from the rest, then go ahead and choose two.

Remember, this is YOUR day, and you and your fiancé can plan it however you want!

For more wedding advice and ideas, follow us onInstagram,Pinterest, andFacebook!

Wedding Etiquette: How to Have Two Maid of Honors (2024)

FAQs

Wedding Etiquette: How to Have Two Maid of Honors? ›

You can ask one of your best friends who is a matron of honor to stand in the second spot. But if they both have the same MOH title, you will just have to decide where they stand. Giving them different jobs during the ceremony is a great way to make them feel equal, no matter where they stand.

How do you have two maid of Honors? ›

If neither are married, then they'll both share the same “maid of honor” title. And if both happen to be married, then technically you'll have two matrons of honor. Either way works! As soon as you ask them to be in your wedding party, let them know that they can share all of the MOH responsibilities together.

Do people have more than one maid of honor? ›

Yes, sometimes having more than one maid of honor can get tricky in terms of divvying up the duties—but in the end, Glantz explains that it's just not that big of a deal if having multiple maids of honor is what will make you happiest on this special day.

How to choose a maid of honor with two sisters? ›

Grumet suggests having more than one maid of honor and designating different duties to each one rather than choosing one sister over the others. She adds, “Of course, it depends on everyone's individual family situation.” An alternative would be to choose your best friend as a MOH and have your sisters as bridesmaids.

How do you set up maid of honor apart? ›

Simple Ways to Make Your Maid of Honor Feel Special
  1. 1) Choose A Different Style MOH Dress.
  2. 2) Have Her Wear A Different Hairstyle.
  3. 3) Give Her A Special Maid of Honor Bouquet.
  4. 4) Style Her Dress with a Unique Belt.
  5. 5) Have Her Help You Into Your Wedding Dress.
  6. 6) Have Her Wear a Different Color Bridesmaid Dress.
Jul 27, 2018

Can my mom be my maid of honor? ›

If that bestie happens to also be your mom or parent, you've hit the jackpot! Can one of your parents pull double-duty and also serve as the bridal party member of honor? You bet! In fact, feel free to buck tradition and pick the parent who isn't a woman for this role if you desire!

How to write a dual maid of honor speech? ›

Go into a memorable story together. Whether you decide on a romantic story or a funny one, try to tell a story not many guests know about so everyone will be giggling, awwing and smiling along with you. Keep it under 5 minutes. Just because there are two of you speaking, it doesn't mean you get double the time.

Can my aunt be my maid of honor? ›

Contenders for your maid of honor can be absolutely anyone you're close to and want to honor on your special day. As far as family, sisters and cousins make excellent candidates, but you are not obligated to give the honor to someone you're related to.

Can you have a best man and no maid of honor? ›

Experts Weigh In. The short answer: No.

How to choose a maid of honor between two best friends? ›

How To Pick Your Maid Of Honor If You Have Two Best Friends Or...
  1. Have a Matron and Maid.
  2. Make A Deal To Rotate Turns.
  3. Consider Three Things: The Duties Of The Job, Their Current Situation & Your Relationship.
  4. Have Co-Maid of Honors.
Aug 17, 2016

Who should be my maid of honor, my sister or best friend? ›

If you only have one sister and have a good relationship, she should be the obvious choice for your maid of honor role. She'll likely know you better than anyone, understand your vision for your big day, and be happy to step up to the responsibilities involved.

Does the groom's sister have to be a bridesmaid? ›

If your soon-to-be spouse has sisters, chances are, you'll have a sister-in-law bridesmaid; however, experts point out that the decision of whether or not to ask your sister-in-law to be your bridesmaid is a personal one.

Is your sister normally your maid of honor? ›

Whoever you want. It is not obligated to pick a sibling as the maid of honor or best man. If you have a good relationship with your sibling and are close with them, you could certainly pick them. But if you are distant with them and have closer friends, pick your closest friend.

What is etiquette for maid of honor? ›

The biggest role of the maid of honor is to attend to the bride. Be by her side as she's getting ready, in case she needs a glass of water while she's having her hair done or needs your help zipping her dress. During photos, help arrange her dress and veil, and do the same during the ceremony.

Does the maid of honor walk alone? ›

Maid of Honor/Matron of Honor

Before she walks down the aisle, she should do a final check to make sure the bride's veil, dress, and train look perfect. Then she walks down the aisle solo, following the rest of the bridesmaids, and stands at the bride's side during the ceremony.

Does the maid of honor walk out first? ›

The maid or matron of honor will walk alone after other bridal party members.

Is it OK to have 3 maid of honors? ›

You can have one, two, three, or even more maids of honor. Choosing a maid of honor is one tough choice, but if you're not sure between two or three different friends and family members, why not pick all of them?

What's the difference between a maid of honor and a matron of honor? ›

A matron of honor is anyone who occupies the same role and fulfills the same duties as a maid of honor, but has already had a wedding of their own. The title holds the same rank as "maid of honor" does in a wedding party. A maid of honor, on the other hand, is someone who is unmarried.

Can a family member be your maid of honor? ›

Contenders for your maid of honor can be absolutely anyone you're close to and want to honor on your special day. As far as family, sisters and cousins make excellent candidates, but you are not obligated to give the honor to someone you're related to.

Does your maid of honour have to be your sister? ›

Whoever you want. It is not obligated to pick a sibling as the maid of honor or best man. If you have a good relationship with your sibling and are close with them, you could certainly pick them. But if you are distant with them and have closer friends, pick your closest friend.

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