Can You Have a Bridal Shower If You Plan to Elope? (2024)

FAQs

Can You Have a Bridal Shower If You Plan to Elope? ›

The consensus: Whether or not the elopement is a secret, it's perfectly fine to have a bridal shower. Here's how to make sure it's done right.

Ultimately, as with all traditions, you have to do what feels right to you. If you strongly feel you want a bridal shower after the wedding and your guests are on board, go for it! But mostly, it's a good idea to fall back on traditional etiquette, whatever the challenges of our modern times.

Most eloping couples don't have a best man or maid of honor or groomsmen or bridesmaids, but they certainly can!

You don't want the first time your close friends or family hear about your elopement to be on social media. Telling friends and family that you're eloping before you actually do it can go a long way in minimizing hurt feelings.

The bridal shower is designed for just you and the girls while the wedding shower is a co-ed party where the bride and groom both get showered with gifts and love. If you're a bride who loves to party and celebrate, then have both a wedding shower and bridal shower!

Yes! Just because you've decided against a traditional event doesn't mean you can't enjoy the pre-wedding parties.

It's okay to have a shower for an encore wedding, as long as you are careful with the guest list. People who were invited to your previous showers should not be invited again, with the exception of your mom, of course, and very close relatives and friends who you know would want to be there.

Your elopement will be considered a legal marriage if you've followed the rules for marriages in that state. Many couples wonder whether their ceremony will be recognized as a legal marriage, simply because it feels so different to what a wedding is normally like. But being unique is the whole point of an elopement!

Even if you aren't throwing a big wedding, you can still have a best man (or best woman, or best person) or maid/matron of honor (or man of honor, or person of honor). In fact, many eloping couples who invite guests end up with a tiny little wedding party of their own!

Think of a post-elopement party as a wedding reception minus the ceremony. Like a traditional wedding reception, it's a chance to celebrate your newlywed status with your closest friends and family members.

How to tell family you got eloped? ›

Worried about how to broach the subject? Try this: “Mom and dad, we wanted to let you know that my fiancé(e) and I have decided to have a more intimate and private destination wedding, an elopement. After a lot of discussion, it is really what is best for us and what represents our personalities and our partnership.

If you're telling your loved ones that you're eloping before the knot is tied, I recommend telling them in person. If that's not an option, videochat them so they can see your face! This will make it feel more intentional and personal – they'll know you thought this through and that you care about their feelings.

This is probably the most important part of an elopement ceremony if not all ceremonies. Well-thought-out vows are the central pillar on which all other ceremony decisions are based. We recommend that you spend more than just one evening writing your vows.

In short, the host is the one who pays for the bridal shower—or at least some of it. Most commonly, this is the maid of honor, but the couple's relatives, friends or even the to-be-weds themselves can all pitch in to cover the cost of the wedding shower.

Today, it's common for the maid of honor or matron of honor — sometimes in conjunction with the mother of the bride — to plan the shower. However, the bridesmaids, wedding party, and the bride's family can all pitch in if necessary. Another modern trend is to make bridal showers gender inclusive.

Traditional etiquette dictates that the maid of honor—not the mother of the bride—should host the shower. Nancy is a freelance writer for MarthaStewart.com. Some etiquette rules were meant to fade away into oblivion, like the one about family members of the bride not hosting her bridal shower.

Many couples find this intimate activity to be an incredible bonding experience. Embracing, helping each other get clean, and talking in close proximity—all while completely naked with nowhere to hide—are all deeply vulnerable activities that can build on existing foundations of trust and safety.

Is It Rude to Be Invited to a Shower but Not the Wedding? In short, yes, it is rude to be invited to a shower but not the wedding. A few exceptions to this rule include elopements, micro weddings and destination weddings.

It's totally up to you and your fiancé to decide whether he will attend the bridal shower. Modern etiquette suggests that he show up toward the end of the shower to say hello and help stock up the car full of gifts.